AH! I'm so happpyyyy. Happy Happy Happy Happy Rachael. :). Yesterday was a blasty blastttt. I got home from lacrosse got all clean and Richard and a few of his friends picked me up and we went down to the north end. It was my first time going down with all of them (apparently it happens every friday night) haha. And it was surprisingly really really fun. I'll admit I was a little bit iffy about going but i'm glad i did. I met up and talked to some new people and it was fun stuff. We made a fire and hot dogs. I didn't really make any hot dogs though...I just mooched off of Richards. :). Yeah, but like every person there was trying to start conversations with me. It was wierd. They all said the same thing to me, "Hey Rachael, I have never talked to you before and I feel bad because I see you all the time so what's up?" Haha. Yeah. And then of course everyone asked about me and Richard. Chyeahs. But then we left and I still had a little bit before I had to get home so for old times sake Richard and I went over to Veteran's Park and walked around the pond like we use to do. Good nightttttt, very good night. :)

Haha, I know. I'm terrible at writing in this. I usually only write in it if something interesting happens. Oh well, not like there is more than two people who read it.
But anyways, my life is AMAZING now. I cannot really talk about it yet, because it's a secret. :). It has to stay a secret for a little bit longer. But yes. My life just seemed to totally flip around in a blink of an eye. One day it was the norm and then the next it turned into something fantastic. Everything happened so fast, but i'm so glad it happened. I'm just ready for it to not be a secret. I'm ready to tell people. Hopefully not too much longer...

Wow, Today is the day my whole life has turned around...
I never thought it would happen, let alone happen all at once like this. I'm lovinggggg this!
:)

Well, I think too much. I broke down for about ten minutes last night. Like straight up total break down. Haha. Funny...I'm quite pathetic. But I find myself doing a lot better now. I think things will get totally better once I can drive again. Which I would like to say is in 12 DAYS! But yes, birthday today! Pretty exciting. Mom has made me yet another ugly birthday cake. It always seems like my cakes turn out ugly. Hahaha. That's okay. She tries...But yeah. Nothing big is happening or has happened. I still have no idea what im getting for my birthday or anything...haha. oh well. Laters.

Well, two people is enough.
It's been FOREVER since I posted actually something. I hit a beyond rough spot in my life and I think i'm finally starting to get over it now. Hanging out with friends has really been helping. Friends I have found are the only things that are going to get me out of this rut. I still look back on my life and honestly, as sad as it is, I want it all back. I would take is back for anything...But whatever, i'm not getting it back. People have moved on, I just need to find other things to do in my time. I find if I don't have anything to do, I sit around and think about it all and get all upset. I'm pathetic...Sometimes I just wish I could rewind back to summer '09. Best time of my life...Oh well. I'm depressing, I know. But I try not to show it. Think i'm doing a good job? But anyways, besides that crap in my life, everything is straightening out, there are so many good things that came out of all of this. I find the 'old rachael' coming back. I have my confidence back because for some reason it disappeared for a while. I'm also back to my social, happy, somewhat loud and crazy self. (most of the time :).) Haha. But I owe that to my friends, they have helped me to find that. :). But anyways, new year, new Rachael. That's what I like to think. I'm turning myself more towards school, lacrosse, and friends now. Screw boys...I hate them. Haha.
So first is school. It's amazing this year. I have an online class third block, so on most days I find myself leaving school at 11:45. LOVE. Haha. But first block, french trois. I was expecting it to be a lot more fun than it really is. And then second is actually better than I thought it was going to be. AP Lang...oh goodness. The class sucks, but I talk to people more and the teacher and I are getting to talk more. Which is good because he's gonna be seeing a lot of me. I suck at english...haha.
Then Second, LACROSSE. I find myself obsessing over lacrosse. It really does seem to be the only thing that gets my head completely away from everything. I get out there on the field and nothing else matters except me and the game. I went to a tournament the other weekend on a Saturday. The friday before was probably the worst day I have ever had in forever and I was contemplating whether I was going to play lacrosse the next day. But I did, and boy am I glad I did. I rocked, the team rocked, we almost beat apex! And best part is, for a few hours I had totally forgot about everything that has been going wrong. It was amazing. I'm trying to dedicate myself to lacrosse and hopefully get somewhere with it. I've gotta admit, I will be devistated if I can't find somewhere to go for college for lacrosse...
The third, friends. I lost a lot of friends in the last few months. I take responsibility for that. But I'm slowly getting them all back and things are getting back to normal. I miss the norm. :/. I miss my friends. I miss hanging out with all of them, doing all the crazy things we did. It really makes me sad when I think about how I threw that all away over a boy. I'm really trying to get friends back. I miss them...and honestly, I need them more than ever right now.
But anyways, I get driving privs back in 19 days. Get my after nines tomorrow if I want them...I figure it does not really matter though since I can't drive anyways. Might as well take my time getting the after nines...Haha. Yup, 17th birthday in exactly a week. Doesn't seem like anybody cares. Haha. But I really don't either. But I find it wierd how my parents haven't even asked me what I want, or haven't even brought the subject of my birthday up? Okayyyy...Can't you see how loved I am? But yeah, just an update on the life.

Well, does anyone read this? Haha. I guess i'll start writing up here if i get any responses or anything...but if not. oh well. i was reading through jordan's and it looks like fun so i want to try and get writing to it more.